marriage

Tomorrow, June 6, is our fifth wedding anniversary.

Over the years I have been asked all sorts of weird questions about being married, such as "how did you know she was the one?" and "are you sure you'll love her for the rest of your life?"

Usually these questions come from younger females or single dudes. But, the truth is that I don't have any answers for them.

Maybe these kinds of questions are best working themselves out? Who really has a check list that they look to fulfill before deeming their bride-to-be marriageable? At this point, and probably before June 6, 2003, being married just seemed like the natural state of affairs. There was nothing to assess or question; it just was.

The truth is that marriage is, in itself, nothing but a contract -- two names signed on a sheet of paper. People get married and divorced all the time. Just go ask Liz Taylor, she'll tell you. But your relationship, well, that certainly matures afterwards. All sorts of virtues blossom from the fertile soil of marriage. Patience, compassion, peace, love, understanding -- basically all the good things in the world -- can be yours. Perhaps the institution is a leap of faith, but, if you are sensitive to the world around you, at the right time, you will know when to jump.

As Sigmund Freud is quoted as saying, "When making a decision of minor importance, I have always found it advantageous to consider all the pros and cons. In vital matters, however, such as the choice of a profession or a mate, the decision should come from the unconscious, from somewhere inside ourselves."

And so, when this silly person told me to take pictures of her in Lapland nearly six years ago, something obviously clicked.