Wednesday, February 25, 2009

say aah!

I know I sometimes paint Marta like a melodramatic person, and she is in many ways. But sometimes I must admit that when I watch her I get incredibly strong flashbacks from my own childhood. Maybe all parents get these from their children.

Marta likes to stand on the bed and sing along to music. This reminded me of how I could perform whole segments of Little Shop of Horrors. My favorite was Steve Martin's song about being a dentist. I would grab a fake microphone and do the whole scene.

The trouble is that a lot of my childhood media is no longer appropriate for children. Like, Little Shop of Horrors is about a giant plant from space that feeds on blood. Steve Martin's character gets chopped up into little pieces and fed to the plant. Somehow, I didn't feel like explaining this to Marta. But I showed it to her anyway, and she loved it!

Now she says:

I want to see that song!

Which song, Marta?

You know, the one that goes 'dum dum dum'?

Huh? Which song is that?

[Marta gets frustrated and thinks]

You know, the one where the man says, "Say Aaah!"

Oh, that song!

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

barbie wars

If there is one thing Marta likes, it's being alone in the tub with her Barbies. She can spend a good hour and a half making up dialogues like:

What's your name?

Sleeping Beauty.

Oh, I like that! What's your name?


Cinderella.

Oh, how beautiful!

But, alas, Marta does not like to share her Barbies with little sister Anna. Last night, I went in to the bathroom because Anna was crying. I could see that Marta was keeping all the Barbies in one side of the tub, and had reserved a few smaller toys for Anna's use. I said:

Marta, can't you share one Barbie with Anna? I mean, you have five of them.

I don't have five Barbies! I have one, two, three, four, five, six, seven Barbies!

Well, can't you share one of your seven Barbies with your little sister? Just one?

No.
But if Marta likes to spend time in the tub with her Barbies, Anna likes to get up before Marta, who always is the last to wake up in our house. And the first thing Anna goes for is Marta's Barbie stash, so she can play with all seven Barbies all by herself!

Thursday, February 12, 2009

gran canaria

The last week of January we went to the Canary Islands, an Spanish archipelago located off the west coast of Morocco. You can read about my personal experiences on my blog, Itching for Eestimaa. But how did the girls do?

First of all, Marta was very excited to go there, because she thought she was going to Africa. Geographically, I would group the Canary Islands with North Africa, but because of their language and culture, they are completely European. This didn't matter to Marta; what mattered is there were palm trees.

Marta made friends everywhere she went. On the flight, she made friends with a little blond girl named Nora and a boy named Robert. Robert was the same age as Marta, and Epp remembered that when we registered Marta when she was born, there was one name ahead of hers -- "Robert Andre." We wondered if this was the same little boy from the Viimsi Parish birth registry.

Nora was older than Marta and came looking for her during our flight, which took six and a half hours -- pretty long. They also ran up and down the aisles on our return flight.

As a person, Marta is very melodramatic and given to whining. I do not hold this against her; it is just who she is. Depending on her mood, she may begin to sob if you brush her hair or request her to walk somewhere. This was the case in Puerto de Mogan. She just refused to walk and had to be carried like a baby. Luckily, a few things made her mood change. 1) We got her a cool African hair braid; 2) we got her some churros and chocolate. As you can see she really enjoyed it.




Our hotel was laid out in an enclosed series of bungalows. Most of the guests seemed to be Estonians, Finns, or Brits. Breakfast was included, and on the first morning we were alone in the restaurant I saw an older blond man wearing a cowboy shirt with a little brown-haired girl in a retro polka dot shirt. The way he palatized his words made it clear that they were Finnish. The way they were dressed made him look like a grown-up Mike Teavee with a miniature Veruca Salt. Art imitating life?


We encouraged Marta to befriend her. The two were at first shy, but then they became friends later in the pool. The girl's name was Jennifer, and her mother was from Russia. But Jennifer attends a international school, so she speaks English -- this is the language Marta and her spoke to each other.


Once friendship was achieved, Marta seemed like the alpha partner. She was always going to Jennifer's place, screaming her name out in the courtyard so that every living being could hear her. But Jennifer really liked Marta too. One time Marta ran back to use the toilet and while I was wiping her, I looked up and saw Jennifer making funny faces through the window. She was 6, Marta is 5. Because Marta loved Jennifer so much, I played her this song on YouTube. Marta really likes it.



But what about Anna? She was in an interesting position because there were no kids her exact age. There were older girls, like Marta and Jennifer and Madli, who stayed a few bungalows down from us, and little babies, like Kirke, Madli's sister. Kirke is the second Kirke we know, by the way. It's a popular name in Estonia these days. It's the eesti version of Circe, the Greek witch.


Because Anna was too small for big girl games, she tried to keep up and swing on the swings, but couldn't. So most of the time I was with her I was restraining her from trying dangerous things. She had a great time though. It was very sunny and she loved being around all the kids. Anna is accident prone though. She fell one time on th astro turf at the little playground and scraped her nose. So for most of our trip, she looked a bit like Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer.


Anna also learned how to say one Spanish word during the trip: "Hola." She did this without anybody asking her or trying to teach it to her. She would just go around yelling out, "Hola! Hola!" I was very proud of her.





What family trip would be complete without illness. In this case, it started with Marta who threw up two nights before we left. Then it passed to Epp, who yacked all over my pants on the bus to the hotel. Then it passed to Anna, who got a really bad case of diahrea and vomited on me as well (such is the life of a husband and father.) Finally, it was my turn. I was in bad shape on Sunday in Gran Canaria.


Above is a photo of me eating gofio, the local breakfast treat. It's roasted ground cornmeal mixed with evaporated milk and water. It tastes quite good going down and wasn't that bad coming up either. I have been able to resume my consumption of gofio post-vomito, so it must be good.


For Anna, though, we had to buy special milkshakes to sooth her violent tummy. She did not complain at all though. I think I was a bit rude to the Danish family at the playground because I was still reeling from the bad gofio. So, if you are reading this Danish family, it wasn't you, it was me and my gofio.



And what would a trip to a European vacation hotspot be without a visit to a nude beach. The beach in Maspalomas is comprised of acres and acres of sandy dunes. At the Zona Nudista, you can basically find your own private dune and nobody will bother you. It was a lot of fun for us, and it made for good, 'back to nature' types of photographs, before the sand got in our camera. That's one more thing I have to get fixed back in Tartu.

The end.





Wednesday, February 11, 2009

7 habits

So, I just finished this book, The Leader in Me by Stephen Covey. I would characterize it as a sort of self help book for parents and educators, with the emphasis on the latter group.

While I found the book valuable, I would estimate that 75 percent of it is filler -- lots of fluffy first-person accounts from teachers and administrators about how wonderful the 7 habits are or how we need to raise our children to be able to function in this global 21st century where everybody speaks foreign languages and is on the Internet all the time. It's Chicken Soup for the educator's soul. But, like, what are the 7 habits already?

1. Be proactive -- do the right thing; 2. Begin with the end in mind -- set goals; 3. Put first things first -- prioritize!; 4. Think win-win -- balance your needs with others; 5. Seek first to understand, then to be understood -- self explanatory; 6. Synergize -- draw on other people's strengths; 7. Sharpen the saw -- eat right, exercise, sleep well, be in touch with your spiritual side.

I have to say, my saw needs some sharpening. I don't necessarily do any of those things. Spiritual moments are fleeting, even if Evi Kahre (a person trained in Eastern relaxation therapy in Tartu) has taught me home relaxation techniques. Eat right? That takes time and thought and I am hungry. Sleep well? Well, I do need it. Exercise? Only gained by walking. There is no time for the gym in my life.

I particular enjoyed the idea of the family mission statement. I think that we have one -- basically, allowing each individual to attain their maximum satisfaction in life. And here is where I sort of stray from the book, which puts an emphasis on visionary leadership. Do I really want Marta to grow up to be just like Mahatma Gandhi or Martin Luther King, Jr. [both of whom were assassinated]? That seems a bit of a stretch.

I don't want my kids to be civil rights leaders, unless that's what they want to be, of course; I just want them to be personally satisfied with their lives and avoid the self-destructive behavior brought on by feelings of uselessness or purposelessness. In both Epp and my family we have close relatives who have destroyed their lives with drugs and or alcohol, for instance. The ultimate dream for a child in the 21st century is that they are positive, balanced, happy people capable of functioning in a society that can be pretty intrusive and demanding. I mean, when you are supposed to be accessible by e-mail or phone at all times of the day, then you lose some time for saw sharpening.

Marta, I think, is developing well. She has philosophy class with other kids, and she has gymnastics. She could sleep and eat better. She is a night owl. She gets the munchies every night at about 9 pm. "Daddy, my tummy is hungry. It needs food." And since I also snack late at night, it's kind of hard to say no when you yourself are shoveling a cookie in your mouth.

Well, anyway, I am going to go walk to the store to sharpen my saw. Maybe I will have some spiritual thoughts along the way.

Sunday, February 8, 2009

crazy like a fool



Here are Marta's words to this song:

Daddy, don't eat poop
Mommy, don't eat poop
Daddy, don't be a stu-poo
Mommy, don't eat poop