wednesday hits like the atomic bomb

It's sunny and semi warm, but I am tired. I got five hours of sleep last night. Now I have stepped back into the whirlwind of life. Each day I cross things off my list of things to do, each day the list regenerates itself. But do we put our children on our "lists of things to do"? I don't. Everything else takes precedence. I feel quite bitter today; I think it's because of the lack of sleep. I want to be a good everything, but I am spread too thin. And yet others around me accomplish much more; they think I am slacking. So much of my life revolves around tedious bullshit -- fix the computer, fix the curtains. Anna has been asking me for days to go to the beach but, you know, there are so many other "important" things to do. But in the scheme of things they are trivial and give me no kind of life-affirming sustenance. And we still haven't gotten to the beach ...